Red X and the Thieves Guild
by The Mad Dragon
Summary: After surprisingly failing a robbery, Red X decides that if he's going to go up against the world, then he'd better have back up. Includes Jinx! Blackfire! Mammoth! And Ravager!
1. Of Red X's and Black Trans Ams

**Disclaimer:**** I take no ownership of the Teen Titans.**

**Thieves Guild Roll Call.**

**Red X: Expert thief. Leader.**

**Jinx: Magick expert.**

**Blackfire: Air Support.**

**Mammoth: Strong Arm.**

**Ravager: Swordsman. Second in command.**

Summary: _After surprisingly failing a robbery, Red X decides that if he's going to go up against the world, then he'd better have back up. Includes Jinx! Blackfire! Mammoth! And Ravager!_

CHAPTER ONE

**KRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!**

Well that didn't go how I wanted it to. Now I'm gonna need a new bike.

Oh, hi. The names X, Red X. And I just had my ass handed to me by the Teen freaking Titans. _'How did such a tremendous tragedy happen, oh dashing and mysterious thief boy?'_you ask? Well it turns out the Titans having been training their collective asses off, which means it's gotten even HARDER to take them down; even with the new xenothium belt. They've become coordinated to the point of ridiculousness. (Is that even a word?)

If this isn't the low point of my career, I don't what is.

There I was; Just minding my own business while I was robbing the Independent Bank of Jump city, when out of nowhere I get hit by a damn starbolt from the side. When I regained my senses, it was just in time for the Titans to corner me... and... well you get the idea. Finally, I had had enough and summoned my X-cycle and set the self destruct sequence. That had bought me enough time to get out of there... as well as blowing Cyborg's T-car to Hell.

That had almost made getting away empty handed worth it.

_Almost._

Okay Red, stop your bitching and figure out how you're gonna deal with this. Let's figure out how they beat _me,_ so I can create a countermeasure to beat _them._They came at me as a team. I can beat each one of them individually, but nowadays, when they come at me _all together..._ and that's when It hit me.

Teamwork.

Assemble a team that can take on the Titans _and_ walk away form it. Hell, maybe I could even dethrone those Brotherhood of Evil assholes.

Time to pay Grant a visit.

TG

Now, for those of you who don't know who Grant is, let me tell you. Grant Wilson, aka Ravager... and aka the son of Slade. Now, now, don't get your pants in a twist. Grant isn't _nearly _as much of a dick-hole as his dear ol' dad.

Grant and me go back a ways- before I got the Red X suit- me and him worked together once to take on a security firm and walk away with their prize camera prototype (THAT got us a lot of cash, let me tell ya...). Anyways, me and Ravager hit it off and became pals, sometimes we even use each other as key sources of information. In fact, he was the one who told me about Robin's Red X suit.

That particular slip of his tongue was his way of getting back at Robin, since he knew I'd pull it off. Apparently Grant got _pissed _that his ol' daddio wanted to make the boy blunder his apprentice (not that Grant wanted anything to do with his dad, it's that family just makes you do weird things sometimes...). Despite knowing that he only told me this out of radical family dysfunction, I went for it and have not regreted it to this day.

WHY has no one heard of Ravager before now you ask? Simple. Grant doesn't like attention. He's a _very_ low laying mercenary. Not that Ravager doesn't have the skill to be an A-list villain; in truth, his skill level is close to Slade's... but when he has a sword in his hand, I have yet to someone else who could hack and cut as fine as he can.

He's also a walking swiss army knife.

The place where Grant lives is pretty dull, just a plain old four story apartment building with a a parking garage. He really likes being unnoticed, if you weren't able to tell already. Oh! Speaking of the parking garage, there goes his car. Now Grant has one _bitchin'_ 1969 black Trans Am. Ravager has had this car go through so many secret upgrades that he could storm Titans Tower with it and _win._ He _loves_ this car, he loves it so much that I think if it was physically possible, he'd probably _make sweet slow love to it_. This car can do some pretty freaky crap too. Like all the weapon systems, microwave, and mini-fridge have the same control panel.

Hell, I once saw it sprout wings and fly.

So I do the rational thing and jump off the building I'm currently standing on, and teleport down on top of his roof silently. Now, I don't know _how_ he does it, but Grant has this insane ability to detect me whenever I come within at least 20 yards. My attention is suddenly brought to my now ringing cell phone, "Hello?" I answer.

"Get off my damn roof." See? Told ya.

So I slipped into the unrolled window on the right side, took a seat and buckled up (a necessity when Grant drives). Now Grant isn't one for those elaborate costumes that most people in the hero/villain community wear (today he was wearing jeans, t-shirt, and leather jacket for all you detail freaks out there). He's what I like to call a 'plain clothes villain.' It just makes it that more surprising when he opens up a can of whupass.

I'm one of the few people alive to see Slade without his mask, and let me tell ya, Grant looks almost _exactly_ like him. All you have to do is picture Slade's face, subtract about 30 years, lose the eye patch and goatee, and you got Grant. Freaky.

"So what brings you here?" Straight to the point; classic Grant. He doesn't have a subtle bone when it comes to conversation.

"I just had my ass handed to me by the damn Titans." I answered with a tired sigh.

"I know, I was listening to the police scanner. I was going to see if you needed help."

"I don't know what is up with them lately, but it has become damn near impossible to take them on simultaneously. Their teamwork has gotten to the point where I suspect telepathic communication."

Grant took one sharp look at me. I am very rarely this... humble (how I hate that word); and a more efficient Teen Titans meant bad news for any future plans of _everybody_ in the villain community. "Please tell me you have a plan, because you know I'm not a good schemer." It's true, Grant couldn't devise a plan to get out of a paper bag. Another reason old Pop-eye doesn't love him.

"Well, I have an idea... but I'm gonna need both your help... and your opinions."

"Very well." He said immediately. Ravager trusts me for some reason, maybe because I'm one of the few people in his life that hasn't stabbed him in the back. Honor amongst thieves.

"I want to make my own team." I said bluntly.

Grant nearly swerved the car off the road.

"And _what_ precisely gave you this_ idea?" _He asked after regaining his control (both mentally and automobily. Wait, is that even a word? I need a damn thesaurus.).

"Because, my friend, to beat the Titans, you have to beat them at their own game."

"And that would be?" He asked dryly.

"What is the Titans greatest strength? Their teamwork. Their determination. _Their friendship._ If we assemble a team with these qualities, we'd have a shot at being the only bad guys in the city that they couldn't bring down." I said hoping my little speech hit home.

"You wish to make this team... from villains? As a whole, we tend to be loners and very anti-social. What you have planned will not be easy." Grant said immediately going into what I like to call 'Ravager-mode.' He may suck at strategy, but he does know how to assess situations, and people. That's why I went to him.

"Well, we start out picturing out who would be the perfect foil to each Titan." I speculated. "Me for Robin."

"And me for Beast Boy." He said after thinking a moment.

_Beast Boy?_ "Beast Boy?"

"My primary fighting skills involve blade work and battle adaptation. Beast Boy can transform into various animals with claws and teeth. I am the _only_ choice." He said with finality.

"Okay, okay, okay." I murmured. "What about those three Hive students? Jinx, Mammoth, and Gizmo?" I asked thinking of the possibilities.

"Yes to Jinx and Mamoth, but no to Gizmo." Grant said after taking a rather alarming swerve onto the express way.

"Why no Gizmo?"

"Gizmo is an unprofessional ten year old nuisance who I wouldn't trust enough to polish my boots. Besides, would you really want to spend everyday with that annoying little turd?"

Hell no. "Okay, sooo that would be Jinx for Raven, and Mammoth for Cyborg?"

"Precisely." He said as he passed paused long enough to flip a cop the bird and outrun him in 54 seconds. Grant must be feeling like taking it slow today.

"Okay, what about Starfire? Who do we get for her? No one is really coming to mind." I said after running through a bunch of bad guys that I knew in my head.

"Easy. Her sister Blackfire. Although we may have to go off planet to get her... as well as break her out of a prison." Said Grant.

"The cutie has a sister? And how would we _get_ off planet?"

"Blackfire is the older sibling, and the Trans Am has spaceship mode along with a hyperdirve." He spoke as if he was talking about the weather.

... The HELL?!

"..."

"X?"

"Hold on. I'm still trying to deal with the fact your car can fly in outer space. Where the hell did you even _get_a hyperdrive?" I asked trying to figure out my friends weird ass mind.

"It involved two six packs of root beer, one slingshot, and a panicky corporate secretary." Strange things happen when Grant undertakes a mission. A lot.

Moving on. "Okay, so where are we going?"

"Drakham Penitentiary. We're going to break out Jinx and Mammoth."

"Ok. So, smash and grab or sneak and swipe?" I asked.

"Hmm, I don't think we'll have time to make a plan to sneak in, so I guess we should do a smash and grab."

After that, things went into a comfortable silence. I began to think what the gloriously bootilicius Starfire's sister might look like. I'm thinking nice _loooong_ legs with a firm bottom and a rack t-

"We're here." Grant said pulling on his Ravager mask and setting the car into park.

Now this mask of his is a bit creepy for those of you who see it for the first time, it's this pitch black full face mask with these big blood red eyes. To make it even more creepy is the fact that Grant splotched red paint all over to look as if it had been sprayed with blood. Intimidation: it's an art unto itself.

I was about to make a clever remark when Grant pulled out a rocket launcher from his trunk. I shut my mouth real quick.

"I thought we were just gonna smash, not make things go kablooey."

He just gave me a blank stare. Smartass. Ravager took up aim, and fired.

Getting my ass handed to me by the Teen Titans, coming up with an idea that might not work, getting _Grant_ involved, and now I'm helping fugitives, both here and somewhere in space, to escape.

God, I love my life.

TBC

A/N: Ohhhhhhhhhh, I'm gonna have fun with this one.


	2. JAIL BREAK!

**Disclaimer:**** I take no ownership of the Teen Titans.**

CHAPTER TWO

After Grant made a pretty damn big hole in the wall, he and I walked in like we owned the joint.

I dealt with the guards with a few of my new freezing X's and Grant beat the crap out of anyone too stupid to get close. The inmates began to cheer us like heroes and some just begged to be let out. "Sorry guys, not enough room in the car for all of ya." I apologized to my fellow brothers and sisters of thievery.

"There is also not enough air fresheners." Grant said as he passed Control Freak's cell.

"Where the hell are their cells?" I asked after I threw a taser X at a rushing gaurd.

"How should I know? I just figured we'd wander around until we found them."

See? This is why I don't let Grant come up with schemes. Freakin' bull in a china shop, man.

"When we get to Jinx, I recommend you let me do the talking."

Eh?

"Huh?" I asked with grace and intelligence oozing from my every orifice.

"When it comes to dealing with the more... attractive members of the fairer sex, you are, well, _cockblind."_

What Grant said hit me so hard, that I didn't even have a witty response. After a moment, I regained my dignity. "And what do you base this judgement on?" I requested, trying to shove down the urge of taking one of my razor X's and changing Grant's religion.

"Mary Sue."

"Mary who?"

"The brunette with the breast implants who swiped that sapphire crown from you."

Ah. That Mary Sue. "In her -and my- defense; she really, really, really earned it that night." Ah, innuendo.

"The Jameson twins."

"How was I supposed to know they were hermaphradites who ritually sacrificed men to their goddess?!"

"And let's not forget the time you slept with John Falcone's daughter."

"Not my fault. Some asshole slipped me a roofy. I was not in charge of of what I was doing. Including her." I said trying to look innocent.

"How long did it take to get his thugs to stop trying to kill you?"

"About two weeks. I got sick of it and framed him and his cronies for treason."

"Got to love those patriotic judges. But I digress, if it has breasts, you lose your inhibitions."

I was silent for a long moment. "You know, you talk an awful lot of trash for a guy who can't remember the last time he got laid."

Grant hacked a door apart with his razor sharp swords.

Okay, message received. Shutting up now.

What you just witnessed is a result of the years me and Grant have worked together, a steady comraderie and faith in one and each other that was earned in blood, sweat, and sarcasm. Yep, me and Ravager have been crackin' heads together since the begining of our careers. And no, we are NOT gay, some moron always jumps to that conclusion somehow. Yeesh, some people out there, I tells ya.

"What the Hell?" A girl's voice asked. Oh, I hadn't noticed we had reached Jinx's cell. She was wearing an orange jumpsuit with a power restraining color around her neck. Her image was tinted blue due to the forcefield.

"Today's your lucky day, Miss Jinx," Grant has a weird thing with suffixes with strangers, "your villain liscence has been upgraded from student to a member of the new Anti-Teen Titans team... what did you want to call ourselves X?"

"I was thinking along the lines of 'Thieves Guild.'" I said after a moment.

"Ah. So, Miss Jinx, care to join? We offer get-out-of-jail-free cards." Grant said turning back to her.

"I'd dance around in a chicken suit if it got me out of this Hellhole!"

"I think that was a 'yes'," I replied to Ravager.

"A commendable choice. Please move away from the blast area." Jinx rushed to the end of her cell as Grant set a freakin' grenade at the base of the forcefield's generator. Me and Ravager backed away to a safe distance.

BAM! Ooooooooooooo... Pretty fire...

Whoa...

Childhood pyromania flashback...

"A _grenade?!_ What the FUCK?! Who the Hell carries grenades?!" Jinx shouted at us.

"Don't look at me. I'm just the adorable thief boy." I said as innocently as I'm capable of.

"Shall we continue? We should free Mammoth before somone in tights shows up."

Jinx looked a bit perplexed, "What about Gizmo?"

"Do ya really want to keep working with the little creep?" I asked her.

"Mammoth's cell is this way." Jinx said as she quickly led us away.

She led us through a whole bunch of corridors. Ugh, I can never remember where I'm going if I don't have a blueprint on me. I kept my mind busy plotting out ways to whup Grayson's ass.

Oh? What's that? I know Robin's secret identity? Shocking, I know. But I'll tell you _that_ story later. Yes, yes, you have to know NOW. But a good little reader has to wait.(A/N: Especially on a fanfic.) "So what happens now, Ravager?"

"The good news; We're outside of the Jump City's jurisdiction, so the Titans most likely won't come. Bad news; the Justice League takes care whatever they can't."

Jinx and I stopped and turned him at the same time. "You're frickin' kidding right? Right now we're at a three fifths of our potential strength, a four if we find Mammoth in time. We ain't ready! What so we do if they show up?" I shouted at him.

"I'm with Skull Face on this one, Spooky. I'm _not_ going up against the big timers." Jinx opined.

_Skull Face?! Spooky?!_ Is there no honor between villains anymore?!

"... pray they don't send Batman?" Ravager answered after moment.

Good point.

After about another minute of walking we finally got to Mammoth's cell. Whoa, big dude...

"Hey Mams, time to go!" Jinx yelled at the giant.

Mams? What in the name of lesbian porn IS it with this girls and humiliating nicknames?

"Sweet!" Then he proceeded to slam through the forcefield himself.

I looked at him in disbelief, "Wait, you coulda busted outta your cell anytime you wanted?!" I shouted.

"Well... yeah. These collar things only take down energy style powers." Then he gestured to the door. "But then I'd have to fight through dozens o' guards without any help. And I'd have no place to go afterwards. I may be dumb, but I ain't stupid." He looked to Jinx, "Please tell me that the runt got sadly killed by a panicky guard with an itchy trigger finger... or do we have to save his sorry ass?"

"We're leavin' him behind." Jinx said a little too... bubble-like.

Mammoth immediately burst into a grin. "Well, hot damn!"

"Jeez, did everybody hate Gizmo?" I asked.

"Yes." Jinx, Mammoth _and_ Ravager replied in unison.

"I only read his file, and I already hate him." Grant stated.

Before I could supply a response, the door in front of us slammed open... and five annoying teenage superheroes emerged...

Titans East.

Heh. And here I thought we were in touble!

TBC...

A/N Sorry for the wait peoples, but between college and my D&D meetings, it's hard to find time to write. That and a little game called Mass Effect has consumed my life...


	3. JAIL BREAK! Part 2

**Disclaimer:**** I don't own Red X and the Teen Titans, but for all intents and purposes for this story, PRETEND I'm Red X!**

CHAPTER THREE

Speedy took the first shot.

It was some kind of concussion arrow, and it hit full in the chest. My suit's kinetic barrier fabric kept it from feeling more than hard punch. So I rolled with it and sent out a small legion of electric exploding X's, not enough to kill someone I assure you, but enough to put him down for a few hours.

Speedy dodges the first seven, but the rest get him dead solid. He goes down with a painful scream; gettin' hit by elecricity ain't fun kids.

I look to the side to see how my new teammates are holding up. WHOA! _Hell's bells_, that _had_ to hurt!

I care not to describe the horrific scene to you, but I will simply give you the aftermath; Aqualad (what kind of lameass name _is_ that?) was on his knees clutching his groin with Jinx standing over him.

Mammoth had disabled Mas Y Menos by throwing them against a wall after they had attempted a fullout charge. They were still breathing, but they had to be hurting.

And Bumblebee... was currently on the ground unconcious with her wings torn to tiny shreds. Damn, Grant sure does work fast. So do these other two apparently.

"Congratulations everyone, this counts as our first victory. From now on we'll look back on this as the day we defeated Titans East, and rendered Aqaulad incapable of conceiving children. Ice cream's on me!" I said as grandly.

"Sounds good and all, but I gotta ask why you guys are bustin' me an' Jinx out." Mammoth said.

"They want us to join their team against the Titans- the real ones, not these pathetic immitations." Jinx explained as she rubbed her aching foot.

Mammoth looked at me seriously and said, "We all get equal shares in everything right? 'Cause they screwed us over in the HIVE academy."

I held my hands in front of me as a peace gesture, "Equal shares all around, I swear. So you in?"

The big man held his hand in front of me, "I'm in. I got a feelin' we're gonna be friends, and I usually have my friends call me Baran."

"Welcome aboard Baran. I'm Red X; but you can call me X. This is Ravager, otherwise known as Grant." I said as I shook his hand.

"Now that we have all agreed to aid each other in our quest of unification against our common foes, may we now vacate this depressing little hellhole?"

I turned to Grat and said, "Acually, I got an idea..."

TG

After me and the others left Drakham Prison the guards found Titans East tied up and beaten, with a single note attached to Speedy's forhead.

_This one was for you and all your pals out there, kid._

_Sincerely, the Thieves Guild._

_P.S., your next._

TG

"Ooh, leather..." Mammoth groaned contently. We had all piled into Ravager's Trans Am, and after the sheer panic and terror of Grant launching us through the atmosphere we all got comfortable. It turns out being in space is actually rather calming, even for thieves, mercs, and convicted felons.

"This is the nicest thing my ass has ever touched..." Jinx sighed.

Everyone in the car swung their heads around to look at her.

She blushed, "That didn't came out like I thought it would."

I love this group!

TG

... or not.

"Are we there yet?" Baran groaned.

"We will be there within five minutes or less. And the next person who asks that question shall drown in a pool of their own bodily fluids." Grant promised with an eye twitch. Wow, two hours and he's already been annoyed to homicidal anger. They beat my record!

"Don't mind Mammoth, he's just hungry." Jinx said as she inspected her fingernails for none existant dirt. "So, X. Why didja start this team anyway? I thought somebody like you was purely a solo act."

"Because I got spanked by the Teen freaking Titans. And if they can do that _once_, I ain't gonna take a chance they can do it again. Thus, I assemble a kickass team to spank _them_, and create a global crime spree." I explained while I checked the suits Xenothium levels. 87 percent, good enough for me.

"Sweeeet." Mammoth voiced.

"That's the plan? No destroy-the-city stuff, right? 'Cause me and Mams don't do that." She said cocking an eyebrow at me.

"Nah, killin's not our style." I replied as I reclined in the seat a bit.

"We're here. R'vyn, Intergalactic Prison for Multiple Races." Grant announces as he brings the car to a giant star-shaped derelict-looking space station. "Now hang on, I am going to blast my to the hangers."

After about ten seconds of the most frightening experiance of my life, we were inside the hanger. There were these crab/human looking alien securtiy guards that we had to plw through to get to the hanger's security console, the fight was so pathetic I won't even begin to describe it. I quickly downloaded all I could onto the suits computer, this way I could actually find what I was looking for instead of relying on Grant's wandering abilities.

It took about only seven minutes of travel, but we found Blackfire's cell. I gotta admit, I was pretty damn excited to see what this girl looked li-

HOLY DANCING LESBIAN VAMPIRES BATMAN!

Scratch that, not girl, this chick's all _woman!_ She looks even better than I imagined her; long wavy black hair, tall and well muscled, these pouty full lips, purple eyes that promised mischief and destruction, she was wearing this armour that coexisted with her top and skirt... And a rack to turn a gay man straight!

"Hello, beautiful. Looks like you're in dire need of a jail break." I said with casual smoothness.

She took one look at me and gave this grin that reminded me of how Catwoman likes to look at Batman. "Well, well, well. What do we have here? A tall dark stranger with promises of freedom? Or a gentleman caller?" She purred.

"The names Red X, and if you ask it of me, I can be both." I said as I deactivated the force field of her cell.

"Hmm, sounds interesting." Her eyes turned serious, "But why _are_ you helping little old me?" she said tracing the X on my chest. Gulp.

"Well, my friends and I were wondering if you would be kind enough to join our ranks in the Thieves Guild. We're a new team that's main goal is to oppose the Teen Titans and any other anti-thievery group on Earth." Blackfire's face showed intrigue after I mentioned the T-words. Looks like I'll have to bait her even more. "And it would be a perfectly good opportunity to get even with your sister, who is coincedentally the one responsible for your previous incarceration. What do you say?"

"Well, with an offer like that, how could I say no?" She marched forward and looped her arm around mine and lead me past a dumbstruck Thieves Guild.

Mammoth and Jinx had never seen me lay on the charm before, so they were rather dumbstruck. Ravager just shook his head and did a weird thing that made me think he was rolling his eyes.

But before we could all leave, a security guard busted through the door and layed his aim at Blackfire's head, "You're not going anywhere, _troq!"_ He screamed.

Whatever 'troq' meant, it pissed my new... _friend_ off to a degree of rage that I have only seen once before, (when Grant's Playboy collection was burned). She let out this _bloodthirsty _war cry, leapt forward into flight and flung starbolt after starbolt into the pathetic little alien. When she reached him, she practically punched him to Apokolips.

After she was done, she readjusted her hair and turned to us. "Well? What are you waiting for? I'd like to leave now."

Good God, I think I'm in love.

**TBC... "The Thieves Den."**

OMAKE:

Santa Claus had been having a very easy going day as his elves slaved over toys for their minimum wage payments, when he found a letter. It had a T symbol on it, so he assumed it must be from those delightful Titan children.

Stupid fat man.

So he opened the letter and found it's troubling contents.

Under the note had been been a picture with a photo of himself with a red x drawn over his face as well as list of demands.

_Dear Santa,_

_We know where you live._

_Love, _

_The Thieves Guild._

**A/N: Yes. I have Christmas issues and I'm never get over them.**

God, this fic is so fun. First, Red X is an amazingly fun character to narrarate with, and now I'm gonna have even more fun with shameless BlackfirexX!

And yes, Mass Effect still owns my handsome ass. If you wish to understand my obsession, I'll lay it out in three words; BLUE SPACE LESBIANS!!!! That is all.


	4. The Thieves Den

**Disclaimer:**** I do not own Red X or the other members of the Thieves Guild, but I willown the eventual sixth member... I thin, I haven't thought that far.**

**CHAPTER FOUR**

"Grant, I swear, if you play Barry Manilow again, I _will_ reconsider my policy of not brutally maiming and/or killing people." I growl as I turn the radio off.

"You simply have no taste for the classics." Grant says to me. "Besides, we're almost back home."

"Speaking o' homes... do we got one?" Mammoth asked as he picked some kind of green substance from his ear.

"... actually we haven't worked that part out quite yet." Grant says.

"What do you mean when you say 'we'?" I ask.

Everyone's attention shifted to me, except for Blackfire who was in the back, snoring... loudly. "Well I may have somone who I can call, but only in private."

"Do you mean... _her?"_ Grant spoke in near awe.

"Who are we talking about?" Jinx pondered.

"My teacher." I say with finality.

TG

After we landed back on Earth in some farm field, I took out my cell and began the procedure of contacting the Boss Lady. After leaving a bunch of passwords on her various cell phones I managed to get her attention. My cell rang and her voice immediately _purred_ out.

"It's been a while since I heard from you, shrimp."

I smile and say, "Hey lady, I ain't as little as I used to be. So, how's Gotham?"

A sharp, overly dramatic sigh sprang out, "Same as always kiddo, same as always..."

"The Bat bust up another one of your museum prowls again?" I ask with a laugh.

She growls out her answer, "Right on the first try. The cleavage thing doesn't work on him anymore! He's somehow gained immunity!"

"Most women would be happy a man isn't staring at her breasts."

"Happy? They're my primary distraction factors!"

I laugh, God it was great to hear from her again, "As much as I enjoy talkin' to you Selina, I need some info. You said you got hidey holes in every major city in America, right?"

"Yes, why?"

"Because I need one big enough to house five people comfortably. I'm starting this little... anti-Titans group. In Jump City." I steeled myself, because I knew she was'nt going to be happy with me.

"I thought we agreed that you would leave that Bat Family alone. And last time I checked, Robin was a member of said group." She stated with disapproval dripping from her voice.

"No. I never agreed to anything. I only said I'd think about it." I say trying to save myself a severe scratching the naxt time I see her. That, and avoid her Cat Legion of Doom's wrath.

She sighed, slow this time, "This ain't healthy kiddo. When's it gonna stop?"

I'm quiet for a long moment, after thinking my answer through, "When both he and Batman are lying beaten and humiliated on the ground just as I was."

"... There's a lot of deep tunnels underneath Jump, about a mile down. The mob used to use them in the thirties. I haven't used them in years, so nothing down there but cat statues and dust."

I breathe a sigh of relief, "Thanks Bosscat. I appreciate this-"

"I gotta go. But don't even _think_ this conversation is over kid." And with that, she hung up.

I tend to have that effect on people.

TG

It's been one week since we moved into the cavern.

Things were a little rough at first, but we managed to get things set up. (Let's just say indoor plumbing came first.) What was really surprising was how _frighteningly_ fast Jinx and Blackfire become friends. Now they're always talking in whispers together, giggling like evil, uh... like something female and evil! (Where the hell is my thesaurus?)

I don't know how he did, but Grant set up a full blown security system in under an hour. This is exceptional because we got about two miles worth of tunnels down here, more than one of us got lost more times than we'd like to admit. We also stole ourselves some damn fine furniture for all our rooms, and home entertainment systems for everybody. We weren't quite settled in yet, but we were getting there.

On our eighth day, I had called a meeting. They were all sitting in front of me waiting for what I had to say. Ok then, time to lay down the rules.

"Ok, people. Now that we're all settled in, we need to go over the ground rules for this team. Break one of these tenets, and you will be forcibly expelled from this group." I looke around the room and saw that I had their attention, "Rule One; No killing. Ever. We're not the Brotherhood of Evil or the Legion of Doom, we're thieves, nothin' more, nothin' less. Rule Two; Never steal from those that cannot afford to be stolen from. Rule Three; The team comes first. If you're in a situation where you have to pick the loot or a team mate, choose your team mate. Money or objects can be stolen anytime, but all of us here are indisposable. Rule Four; Leave your personal differance's here. On a job, we can't afford to have our ability to work together disrupted. Rule Five, and this is the most important one," they all looked completely serious as they waited on the edge of their seats for what I had to say, "Have fun. If you take a job too seriously, you'll lose all the enjoyment you get out of it." Everybody in the room gets a smile out of that one, can't let these guys take me too seriously, now can I?

Grant speaks up after I'm done, "All right ladies and gentlemen, now that we have that out of the way, let us discuss our first heist..."

**To Be Continued...**

A/N: God, I hated this chapter, next one will be better, I swear.

A/N2: Since someone PMed me for a full story synopsis, I can't AND won't do this, BUT I've decided to release the TITLES of the chapters that are in the works. Now these are not solid, I may or may not change them. Translation: DON'T FREAKING BOTHER ME ABOUT FUTURE CHANGES!

**CHAPTER FIVE: CRIME SPREE!**

**CHAPTER SIX: Clash of the Titans.**

**CHAPTER SEVEN:Getting a Rep.**

**CHAPTER EIGHT: The Gender Bender Cannon... of DOOM!**

**CHAPTER NINE: Territory.**

**CHAPTER TEN: (Red X origin trilogy, Part One) Requiem of the Fallen.**

**CHAPTER ELEVEN: (Part Two) Lazurus.**

**CHAPTER TWELVE: (Part Three) Getting Even.**

**CHAPTER THIRTEEN: Queen Jinx.**

**CHAPTER FOURTEEN: Half Nekkid Vengeance.**

**CHAPTER FIFTEEN: The Ravaging Ravager.**

**CHAPTER SIXTEEN: Of Undead Thieves and Busty Tamaraneans. **

**CHAPTER SEVENTEEN : (Ravager vengeance trilogy, Part One) Father's Day.**

**CHAPTER EIGHTEEN: (Part Two) Patricide.**

**CHAPTER NINETEEN: (Part Three) Heir Apparent.**

**CHAPTER TWENTY: In the Shadow of the Bat.**

**CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE: Jinx VS Dracula.**

There it is folks, that's all you're gonna get. I have a lot ahead of me. My goal is 100,000 words at least before I finish this thing. (and yes, each Guild Member will get their own trilogy.)


	5. Getting to Know Each Other

**BIG GIANT DISCLAIMER!:**** I own nothing, now shut up and read the story.**

**RED X: **Where the hell am I?

**MAD DRAGON: **Congratulations X, you've broken the fourth wall.

**RED X: **SWEET! I can finally have a say in the story!

**MAD DRAGON: **Say? You're the Goddamn Narrator!

**RED X: **Don't Frank Miller at me.

**MAD DRAGON: **... I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that.

**RED X: **So when do I hook up with Blackfire? When is my name and past revealed? When do I take vengeance on the-

**MAD DRAGON: **NO SPOILERS! And to answer your question, the RED X ORIGIN TRILOGY that's coming up soon. Now it's chapter time.

**CHAPTER FIVE**

Blackfire snores like a demon beast from Hell. But God help me if she isn't the sexiest woman I've ever met.

These were my thoughts as I poked her cheek to wake her up. (Not THAT cheek you perverts!) She moaned and turned her body away. Narrowing my eyes, I move to the other side of her huge bed and pull the covers off of her bo- HOLY NAKED SEXY TAMARANEANS BATMAN!

I take a few seconds (ok, more than a few) to take in the sight, then I knock on her forehead a few times. All I get for my efforts are a few demonic snores.

Grr. Time for the big guns.

With grim determination, I got a bottle of mustard and oozed a strip onto my left index finger. With great caution, I lowered it underneath her nose. Her eyes sprang open and-

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

SHARP TEETH! SHARP TEETH! SHARP TEETH! OH, DEAR SWEET MERCIFUL ODIN! MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP!

After a few moments (read: PAINFUL OUCHINESS) of her biting into my finger, she came to her senses. "Mmm, honey mustard. I knew there was a reason I keep you around." She says as she stre...tches... wow, those are big. I shake my head and snap out of it.

This must be how the Crocadile Hunter must have felt about the animals he tortured.

"Keep me around? Hey, I founded this team! And I'm the leader!" I yelp (in a manly way) indignantly.

"Keep telling yourself that, sweetcheeks." She winks suggestively at me and gets up off the bed.

I shake my head once again and try to remember what I came down here for, "Today we're pulling off our first few jobs, to see how well we do together. We're all gonna start at financial distract in an hour."

She nods along at this and goes to pick up her clothes off the floor, "Well it's about time. I was getting bored, and Jinx, while being delightful company, can only gossip with me so much." She bends... over... to pick up her skirt...

Oh, dear Odin... what have I gotten myself into?

"But that's not all I came here to talk to you about." I say shaking my head for the third time. (It appears naked Tamaranean Princesses are my kryptonite.)

"Oh?"

"I want to know why your sister beat you twice, even though you're older, stronger, smarter and better trained." She looked mightily annoyed until I started giving out compliments. "And I need to you to put some clothes on, because this is very distracting."

"Okay, I'll tell you... on one condition."

I stiffen, (NOT LIKE THAT YOU PERVS) "Name it."

"I get to ask a question and a favor from you, as you just asked of me." Blackfire smirks with a catlike grin. Whoa... Catwoman flashback...

"Ok..." I'm going to regret this...

"Why did you become a thief?" Short and to the point, my kind of girl.

"Because it was what I was raised to do. I tried to change once, but... it kinda blew up in my face. And it gives me one hell of a thrill."

"Hmm, acceptable answer. Now the favor; take off your mask."

DANGER, RED X ROBINSON! DANGER! DANGER!

I'm about to tell her to go to the Hot Unpleasent Place, but then I figure, what could it hurt? I mean it wouldn't be like she knows me. Hell, the last time someone from my past life saw my face, I was dead! (Don't ask.) And she was giving me this giant puppy-eyes pouty lips thing that melted away my willpower and dignity...

Dammit.

I hook my fingers at the bottom of my mask and pull upwards. I hear her gasp a little, "Wow, you're rather handsome. But those scars disfigure your face quite a bit. And words cannot express your need for a tan."

A part of me makes me look at her mirror to see if she really was talking about me. I know what I'll see. Past mistakes engraved forever. I got this pointy kinda face, black hair, blue eyes and a dire need of a tan. There's a large scar that goes across my nose and cheeks. Then a long, thin jagged one on the right side of my face; to complete the look, I'm missing my left ear. Long story short, it got blown off. I can still hear out of it though.

I turn my attention back to Blackfire, she's still staring. "Well there's nothing to do about the scars, but maybe I should get a little more sun."

"So out of curiosity, how did you get those scars?" She asks poking my nose scar not-very-gently.

"I got beaten with a crowbar, then got trapt in an explosion. Now it's your turn." I say trying as hard as I could to maintain above the neck contact.

She pouts and rolls her eyes, "Oh, very well." She then dresses with a speed that would astound any mortal man.

My libido curses my conscience's existance.

"So, to best answer your question I pose a question of my own. What makes a hero, a hero?"

"Lots of things. Disasters, enemies, certain obstacles that need to be overcome."

"Exactly."

It takes me a few moments to comprehend what I just learned. "Wait. Are you telling me that you keep picking on your sister... and losing to her... is _to make her stronger?"_

"Yes. She needs it, don't you think? At her core, she is a shy naive little girl. If she is to survive the cruelties of this universe and become Tamaran's rightful Queen, she needs to toughen up. She needs to replace her innocence with something else."

"Like what?" I'm almost afraid of the answer. Almost.

"A warrior's heart. She needs to accept her _true_ warrior heritage."

Realization dawns on me and my jaw drops, "That's why you _really_ joined this team isn't it? To provide her a challenge even _you_ aren't sure she'll overcome?"

"Right now she is _weak._ I thought letting her win a few times might give her a confidence boost and spark a more independant personality. Make her take control of the Titans and relocate them to Tamaran. Sadly, she clings to her team and obeys orders like a good little drone." She gestured about as paced a groove in the floor.

"You want the Titans on Tamaran?" Okay, what was she smoking when she made this plan? 'Cause I want some!

"I made that little arranged marriage to make her reurn with her friends to see how _incompetant_ the laws and people on Tamaran have become in our parents absence! But nothing will change now because that- _**blundering idiot of a glorified nanny**_- _**Galfore **_is in charge!" I swear her eyes turned red for a little bit there. "I even let her win again! By X'Hal, how did she get so _stupid?!_ She used to do so _well_ in her academics as a child! Pff, I wonder what Mother and Father would think of their prescious Koriand'r now." She sighed after her little tantrum and flopped down on the bed.

"Koriand'r?" I ask.

"It's what 'Starfire' translates into our language." She states absently as she stared blankly at the ceiling.

"Ah, so what would your name translate into?" I ask curiously.

"Komand'r."

"Sounds kinda gruff and rugged like, I think I'll call you Mandy instead." This gets a reaction.

She turns her head at me, raises her eyebrows... and smiles. "'Mandy.' I like it."

"I wouldn't worry about your sis. You can never predict what people are going to do with their lives. Life has a way of twistin' a person so many whichways that you can't predict the person you'll be years from now." 'Cause God knows I've changed paths so many times in my life that my personal history requires a road map.

She nods and smiles; then says the most random thing ever.

"Did you know that Earth generates more pornogaphy than any other world in the known universe?"

_What in the name Wonder Woman's star-spangled panties? _

"Huh?"

"I mean, your people just keep chugging it out! Oodles and oodles of it. So many genre's too! You could make a rainbow with 'em! A _pornbow_ if you will..." I pay attention as she speaks of the wonders of the porn industry, but I'm really just watching those pretty purple eyes.

And what have we learned today kids?

Answer; Mandy snores like a demon beast from Hell, she's an amateur manipulator, has GIGANTIC mood swings... and apparently she loves her sister very, very much. And she's a porno addict.

Dear lord, I _am_ in love.

TBC...

AN: Thanks for the reviews folks, they are the fuel that makes a fanfic author mighty, MIGHTY I SAY!

I love having X and Blackfire together. So much in common.

For example:

Red X: Thief.

Blackfire: Thief.

Red X: Pervert.

Blackfire: Pervert.

Red X: Humoursly nuts.

Blackfire: Humoursly nuts.

Red X: Not evil.

Blacfire: Not evil.

Red X: Used to dealing with crazy people.

Blackfire: Crazy person.

That's all you get for now kids, your lucky my schedule let me have enough freetime to write even this short chapter.

See ya when I see ya kids! Same Guild time, same Guild channel!


	6. Clash of the Titans

**DISCLAIMER:**** If I onwned Teen Tiatns, it would have been a LOT less kiddie.**

**A/N: I've been cruising fanfic stories lately and have come to a conclusion: Songfics **_**suck.**_** I'm sorry if I offend anyone, but it's true. It's a waste of a good song and a story. It's hard NOT to hate them.**

**CHAPTER SIX: Clash of the Titans.**

KABOOM!

I love the smell of burning Xenothium in the morning.

For the past week the Thieves Guild had been performing admirably. So far, we've taken down three banks and one museum. We have so much money now that we made a pool made of nothing but one dollar bills! But the best part is that made sure to pull the jobs so quickly and randomly the Titans never got there in time. They must be plenty pissed by now, especially Grayson.

What? Did you forget that I know the entire Bat Family's secret ID's?

"Okay, guys. I think today should be the day." I annouce to my friends. (Yes, they have earned that title.) Today was the day we take on the Titans, and it couldn't have come sooner. A simple bank job should be enough to gain their attention.

"Whoohoo! I get to bitchslap a half demon super-witch!" Jinx exclaims.

"Stay frosty people. Let's just hope Robin will listen to our terms." Grant says calmly, as always.

It didn't take less than two minutes. The T-Car (Hey! They rebuilt it already? Guess I trashed my bike for nothin'...) came roaring across the road. Two shapes in the sky. Starfire and Raven. Cyborg slames on the breaks and the Titans rush out of the vehicle. In a matter of seconds, all five Teen Titans stand before us. Show time.

"Heya Bird Boy! Long time no see!" I wave peppily at them.

"Komand'r!" Koriand'r yells at her sister.

"Tachyand'r!" Mandy yells sarcastically at her. I think that one means 'Bratfire.' How do I know Tamaranean you ask? Well, it could be that I am a gentleman thief that speaks all th languages of _love._... that and I looked the language up on wikipedia.

"Red X." Robin growled out. Ya'd think Bruce woulda taught him how to deal with anger. "I see you need help to beat us now." He smirks as he regains control of himself.

I decide to surprise him, "Well it is true that I can no longer beat you all singlehandedly-" all the Titans register shock at my humility, "But I can guarantee you that I can still wipe the floor with you kid. I got this collection of thieves and baddies so your friends would be too busy to see me kick your ass. Ain't I generous?"

I notice Blackfire and her sister glaring at each other out of the corner of my eye, I ignore it so I can see what Dick's gonna do.

"We'll see about that. TEEN TITANS G-"

"WAIT!" I yell out. And surprisingly, they stop.

"There's a better way to do this. Now if we attack each other all at once, a whole Hell of a lot the city will get damaged. So I recommend that we do this one at a time." I say diplomaticly.

"How do we know this ain't a trick?" Cyborg asks, sonic cannon still on us.

"Because my team's gonna win either way." Mammoth replies to the tin man.

"Or are you all scared?" Jinx snipes.

Robin still looks uncertain, time to sweeten the pot. "And if a single member of my team loses; We'll ALL surrender."

The Titans look shocked at this, and my teammates shuffled a tad uncomfortably. Robin looked to his team, they all nodded at him. Dick narrows his eyes, "Ok, X-"

"Only my friends get to call me that."

He grinds his teeth, "Ok, _Red X._ We agree to your terms. Who goes first?"

"Beast Boy against Ravager." I say immediatly.

Beast Boy smirks to his friends, "Don't worry guys, how bad could this guy be?"

What he _should _have done was keep his eye's on Ravager. See, when an opponent takes his attention away from Grant, it _irks_ him. 'Disrespecting a fellow warrior,' he calls it.

So it could come to no surprise that Ravager made a running jump and relocated his foot into Beast Boy's face. "Very bad." he simply says as he regains his composure.

To give the Green Idiot some credit, he recovers pretty quick. He transforms into a tiger and leaps at Grant, but the swordsman sidesteps him, unsheathes a machete, and makes a light stab into BB's side in single smooth motion. Beast Boy roars and transforms into an ape and takes a swing. Grant ducks and cuts him across the chest. The changeling staggers back, but regains himself. He turns into velociraptor and launches himself forward, feet first. This attack actually gets Ravager, BB's claws slam into his shoulder and blood splurts off every whichway. My friend lies on the ground, while Beast Boy looks proud of himself back in his human form, and turns to his friends, "Heh, I guess this means... I win..." he pants.

But Ravager isn't done yet. He snaps out of his daze and takes the unsuspecting changeling by surprise. Leaping up to his feet, Grant slams his fist into Beast Boy's gut and strikes the handle of his blade into the shapeshifter's temple. "No, it means you should learn to finish your opponent." Grant states. He walks back to us, takes a med kit from one of his coat's pockets and begins to bandage his shoulder wounds.

"Well that was rather entertaining," I remark. "Looks like you should train your team better for solo fights, kiddo. You never know when you're gonna actually have to fight like a man. I'll even let you pick which one of your friends goes next."

Robin looks mighty pissed, but he replies instantaneously. "Cyborg. Take them down."

"With pleasure."

"Mammoth! You're up." I say to the giant behind me. Now this is the only fight I'm actually worried about, Cyborg has a lot more advantage's over Mammoth due to his technological nature. So I can only manipulate this fight slightly in Baran's favor. "One condition though for you, Cyborg."

The man that was once completly human narrows his eye's at me, "Name it."

"No ranged weapons. I want this to be a good old fashioned fist fight. Think you can handle that?"

"I can handle anything you punks can dish out." He growled glaring at me... and I hoped he was wrong.

I looked behind me, Mammoth had this little confident smirk on his face, "Don't give him a single inch." I murmur to him.

"No problem." He said to me, then he launched forward at the hulking titan.

Cyborg responded in kind. They clashed together like two angry giants vying for the mastery of their kingdoms. They laid blows upon one another that would have shattered titanium and make gods bleed. Cyborg unleashed hit after hit on Baran, but Mammoth did his damage as well. After the first few attacks were over, the two opponents found themselves apart and reevaluating each other. Cyborg made the first move when he came at Baran with what would have been a brutal right hook. Mammoth ducked and slammed both fist into the metal man's stomach. Cyborg bent over from the force and Mammoth took advantage of this and struck him with a heavy handed left strike into the top of the human part of his head.

And that was all she wrote, folks.

What's that? Mammoth won too easily you say? Well how about _you_ try getting hit in the head by a geneticaly enhanced superstrong teenager in the head.

Baran began walking back to us, but it looked like he was having a little difficulty. He was clutching his left side and wheezing. "What happened to not giving him an inch?" I ask.

"It got greatly extended," He groaned, "and he busted a couple ribs." Baran groaned again, "Now, if ya 'scuse me, I'm gonna collapse now." And with that, he slumped onto the pavement leaning against a lampost.

There's a sudden sound of sirens coming from all around us. About ten to fifteen cop cars have both us and the Titans surrounding us. They're all following the procedure that all law enforcement agencies use when more than one metahuman gets into a fight; wait until the fight is over, then move. And JPD follow this procedure almost _religously._

"Well kid, looks like we're gonna be humiliating you pretty publicly now."

"Not if I have anything to say about it! TITANS GO!" He yells at me.

_Damn it! _Leave it to Dick to completely overreact the _second_ he realizes things aren't going his way! I hate it when a plan goes down the drain.

Ok, change of plan. "Jinx after Raven, Mandy you-"

Before I know it, Starfire and Blackfire have collided in midair and are going at it like wild animals. (NOT THAT WAY YOU PERVERTS!) And Jinx is sending hex after hex at Raven, I look to Grant and Mammoth, they're in no condition for a fight right now.

Besides, they wouldn't get involved even if they were uninjured. We all agreed to keep this an even fight, otherwise it wouldn't feel like a victory.

The second I turn back to the fight, I see Robin's boot heading toward my face. I dodge. He lands and sets off a bunch of punching combos. I counter them somewhat effectively, some get through some don't. One hits me in the eye and that's when I decide enough is enough. I slam my left knee into his groin. He stumbles back.

Hey, we Guildmates fight evenly. Not fairly.

He leaves himself exposed, and I go to town. Snapback kicks, and the old one-two over and over again. He snaps out of it after a while and makes his staff extend in my face, I get knocked away. Not good. And Robin just keeps hitting me with his staff.

Something crashes near us and we stop to look. It's Starfire and- _Ouch._ Ooooh, she ain't gonna pretty for a _while._ After another few moments we see Raven fall from the sky... Only she's been painted pink and has feathers glued all over her body, several pipes also descend around the yound woman so as to form a cage.

I'm not even going to ask Jinx about that one.

"Well kiddo, looks like you're last Titan standing. Tell ya what, I'll let you give up now and take your friends back to your fancy tower. 'Cause God knows that you're not gonna beat me." I say in a condescending tone that would made even Lex Luthor envious.

_"I'm not giving up!"_ Idiot.

Dammit Dick, it's attitude like that which made Bruce replace you with me all those years ago.

"Fine if you're not gonna leave for the sake of your friends, I got two words that are gonna make you leave."

He sets his body in a stance, ready for whatever comes next. "Oh, yeah? And what would that be?" He growls.

"Dick Grayson." I so quietly so only he and I can hear.

His face falls so dramatically that it'd almost comical if it weren't so pathetic. His mouth opens and closes several times, unable to find the words. I have left him utterly shellshocked.

"Oh, don't worry. I'm not gonna make your ID public, _or_ sell it. I owe you and Bruce too much to do that. But I _am_ telling you to get your friends home and to heal, and the next time you face me alone, have the balls to fight me evenly."

He's quiet for a long while. Then he utters, _"How?_ How did you know?"

"We met a long, long time ago, before you came to Jump."

He finally gets himself together. "This doesn't mean I'm going to stop trying to take you and your little friends down." He proclaims as he scowls darkly at me.

I let my smirk into my voice. "I don't expect it to."

"And from how I see it, I can still win this!" He says and launches into attack.

Ok, now this is just stupid.

He's still shocked by the new information, so he's off his game. Fighting angry. Bad mistake. His attacks are unfocused and just pure force. I block and jab and kick and tackle me way out of his circle. "You just can't let anything go, can you kid?"

"You're just another criminal! Like Slade or the Joker!" He yells at me.

...Did he just compare me to the Joker?

_The Joker!?_

_**THE JOKER!?**_

I rush at him and hit him with a brutal right hook, "DON'T-" knee to his stomach "EVER!" elbow into shoulder, "COMPARE-" slam him into the street, "ME-" pick him up over my head. "TO-" throw him into a window, leap in after him. "THE-" and I finish off by slamming my knees into his chest. "JOKER!"

I get off him and let him collect himself (And myself. Really shouldn't have lost control like that). I calm down enough so I can return to the mentalityof the jesting thief, but before I know it, three razor sharp birdarangs come at me. One hits me in the chest, tearing open a large cut.

Oh, he's in for a surprise.

Grayson looked in shock as the wound on my chest slowly healed and closed shut. "What the hell are you?! And how the hell do you know so much?!" he shouted at me.

I go on an impulse; I remove my mask and look him staight in the eye. "I am Jason Todd's smirking revenge."

His jaw drops and his eye's widen. This leaves him open. Then I throw an electric X, he tries to block it with his staff... but apparently he forgot that steel is a conductor.

Ooh, fireworks! Well, folks. Looks like I win. Oh, don't be like that, he's still alive... I think.

I step up to his prone form, pick up a pipe left over from Jinx's fight and poke him with it. A groan escapes from his bloodied mouth. Yup, still alive.

Heh. It's been a long, long time since I've said that name. Felt good.

Guess this is my curtain call.

Ok, so the day hadn't gone as I thought it would, and I lost my temper when I shouldn't have, but things turned out well in the end.

I turn to my team and smile, even though they can't see it, and I say, "Lets go home."

TBC...

NEXT CHAPTER: Gender Bender Canon. (A more humorous chapter before things get serious.)

**A/N: It appears that a part of Red X's past has been revealed! If you want read the rest of his history, wait for the Red X trilogy, it'll be the chapter after the next one.**

**WARNING! WARNING!****: After the Red X trilogy is finished, the story will no longer be told in Red X's POV! Their are certain element's of the story that can only told in third person POV!**

**To Bolt**: All good things come to fans with patience. Keep reading, and you'll eventually get what you ask for. And get an account here, I need a beta reader.

Now here are some more chapter title previews!

**CHAPTER 22: Schway. (Thieves Guild Beyond Part one.)**

**CHAPTER 23: Red X vs. Batman Beyond. (Part two)**

**CHAPTER 24: Return of the Joker? NOT FOR LONG! (Part three.)**

**CHAPTER 25: Mammoth vs. Grundy.**

**CHAPTER 26: (Jinx Trilogy, Part One.) The Bad Luck Queen.**

**CHAPTER 27: (Part two.) Frikkin' Vampires.**

**CHAPTER 28: (Part three) The Villainess always gets the Hero Boy.**

**CHAPTER 29: Frikkin' Luthor.**

**CHAPTER 30: (Blackfire Trilogy, Part One) The Jewel of Charta.**

**CHAPTER 31: (Part Two.) "You wanna get WHAT?!"**

**CHAPTER 32: (Part Three.) The Once and Future Queen.**

**CHAPTER 33: (Mammoth Trilogy, Part One.) FOR SHIMMER!**

**CHAPTER 34: (Part Two.) Strongest Man in the World.**

**CHAPTER 35: (Part Three.) Tough Guy.**

**CHAPTER 36: Jason Todd's Smirking Revenge.**

**CHAPTER 37: (Metahuman Civil War saga, Part One.) War Drums.**

**CHAPTER 38: (Part Two.) Reactions and Panic.**

**CHAPTER 39: (Part Three.) The Birdarang heard 'round the World.**

**CHAPTER 40: (Part Four.) Making a Stand.**

**CHAPTER 41: (Part Five.) The Death of Red X. (A/N: only temporarily.)**

**CHAPTER 42: (FINAL CHAPTER.) The Birth of Jason the Red.**

**Welp folks, that's it! See ya when I see ya!**

**Also, this chapter almost murdered me.**


	7. The Gender Bender Cannon of DOOM!

**Disclaimer:**** I lay no claim to DC Comics property.**

**A/N: That's right folks! Jason Todd is Red X! And as one of my favorite reviewers said, he's no stupid fanon character!**

**CHAPTER SEVEN**

When I wake up next to a naked alien princess, I can only come to one possible conclusion;

It's gonna be a good day.

Oh, I'm sorry. Was I going too fast for you? Let's rewind, shall we?

Yesterday after the battle we all celebrated in the Thieves Den with copious amounts of tequila, scotch, vodka, and svarfglog (tamaranean drink that prevents hangovers). We sung Queen's _'We Are the Champions'_ for a full ten minutes. Then I carried Mandy back to her room... and somehow are clothes disintegrated (details to how get to the sex part are rather sketchy at this point). But what I do remember was... it was better than any other moment in my life. Afterwards her snoring was a little difficult to get over, but it became kinda soothing after a while.

Sigh. I know what you're thinking. 'Oh, Jason! The two of you are moving too fast! Be a good boy and have the two of you pine over each other for years unitl you actually get somewhere like all the other superheroes!'

Fuck that. I'm a bad guy now.

Now if you excuse me, I have a naked woman in my arms that I need to nuzzle awake.

Okay, the trick to waking up tamaranean females is to not startle them awake, otherwise you get a starbolt in the kisser. And

don't let the unholy snoring scare you! Now the method I'm going to use involves _slowly_ kissing her from the base of her neck to the bottom of her jaw, and _slowly_ leave a trail up to her ear, and proceed to nibble.

I'm awarded with a contented purr... whoa Catwoman flashback, (no I didn't sleep with Selina you pe- oh, you know the drill).

"Mourning, beuatiful." I whisper into her ear.

"Mmm, you wore me out. That's never happened before." She murmurs sleepily.

My arms circle around her and she flips around and buries her face in my neck. "Oh, really?"

"It's still all kind of hazy, but I'm sore in the _good_ way." She purrs out.

"Well I've always been under the belief that no one should leave a bed unhappy."

She chucles so softly that it makes my skin tingle. "So... you said at the party that you want us all to start calling you Jason?"

"Mhm, 'tis my real name."

She adjusts herself and cuddles closer, "And why do you want to go back to being called that?"

I grunt and start toying with her hair, "It's been too long since I heard it from somewhere other than my head."

"Ah. Alright then. Ready for round two?" She asks as she pulls the sheets over us.

So far we've gone from small talk to sex in a minute. Good Odin, I love this woman.

THREE HOURS LATER (due to excessive X-stamina)

As Blackfire and I enter the livingroom, we are greeted by none other than our partners in crime. "Yo dawgz, what be happenin'?" Baran shouted out.

"You're not black, big guy." I answer.

"Fo' rizzle." Blackfire comments as she walks past.

I head straight for the kitchen and decide to make a sandwhich. Hmm, I wonder what makes wonder bread a wonder. Did Wonder Woman make it?

... It's morning. Intelligent thought doesn't come until after ten, okay?

"Hey, X! I need your help with something!" Jinx shouted as she ran up to me.

"This isn't gonna be something I'll regret untill the end of my days, is it?"

She seemed to think about it for a moment, "Uhh, ... about 63 percent most likely."

"... Eh, I've done things against worse odds. What is it?"

ONE HOUR LATER, ABANDONED GM FACTORY.

It turned out that what Jinx needed help with was getting into an old stash of Gizmo's stuff. The little bastard was an annoying piece of crap, but apparently he set up an invinceble security system... for Jinx anyway.

"Well, this was easier than I expected." She mumbles.

"What did you expect? I was trained by the absolute best."

"Mm. So what's with you and Blacky? You two together now?"

I grunt as I yank open a door, "Sort of."

"'Sort of?'"

"She and I slept together, but we haven't really made anything... official." I said with a shrug.

We wander in and start looking around. Eventually Jinx finds something that look like a gun, "'Gender-bender cannon?'" She proceeded to read the short little manual attached to it. "Oh, that sounds like FUN! _Ohhhh, Jason!"_

"Wha-" And before I know it, I get zapped. I'm knocked over about four feet. I try to get up, but there's this FREAKY tingling sensation everywhere. Specifcally in my whole torso area.

"Ow." I remark. But something not right. My voice is... higher. More _feminine._

Meanwhile, Jinx is laughing her ass off. "D-hahaha-d-heehee-dude! You're a-hahahaha- a chick!" And she explodes into gigles once more.

"What the hell are you talking about?" My higher voice says again.

"Just look at yourself!"

I did.

And I wish I hadn't.

Where my chest should be, there wer now... BREASTS. Not little one's mind you. BIG ones! I'm talking Power Girl size sweater-puppies here, man! And that's not all! I turn around and cover myself so I can see if I still have junk in my trunk. Please be there, please be there, please be there, please be there, please be there, please be there, please be there, please be there, please be there, please be there, please be there, please be there, please be there, please be there, please be ther-

"... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

Alas, Big Jay. I knew thee well.

"Oh, don't freak out. It only lasts for about a week."

"A WEEK!?" I yelp.

"Yup, the manual says anyone who gets hit by the cannon is stuck like this for at least a week. And no, it can't change you back." She says in this little sing song voice.

"A... week..." Odin help me...

"Oh! Let's show you off to the others!" She says, clapping her hands together.

"What? Wait a minute!" I can only protest as she drags me toward the exit.

We're so distracted that we actually forgot to grab the loot.

THIEVES DEN

Fifteen minutes later, we're back at home. The fallout is both what I expected and what I didn't.

Mammoth is laughing his ass off uncontrollably, along with Jinx.

Grant feinted.

... And Mandy is groping my tits.

She narrows her eyes as she molests me. "What the hell! They're bigger than _mine!"_

"Well I'm so sorry if they're to your disliking." I growl at her.

Now she looks confused, "What do you mean? I like 'em!" She then proceeds to grope har...der... so _that's_ how it feels...

"M-Mandy, I-"

"Come along. I wish to explore this concept of what you humans call 'Bi.'" And she drags me off. Why can't I ever say no to a pretty face.

As the door shuts behind us I can only think, 'It's gonna be a _long _week.

ONE WEEK LATER

"Well here we are again." I sigh contedly as Mandy awakens in my arms. I was transformed back into a guy right on time, thank Odin.

"Mmhm."

"Now that you're awake, mind if I turn the TV?"

"Go ahead." She mumbles.

I grab the remote and make the walls part to gain access to the television. I turn on the TV... and my day just got a whole lot worse.

"... for those of you just tuning in, we repeat, _the Joker is loose in Jump City!"_

TBC...

NEXT: YOU DEMANDED IT! NOW HERE IT COMES! THE RED X TRILOGY!

A/N: God, I hate transition chapters... Sorry this took a while guys, but my college's got my doing three different essay's for three different classes.

A/N2: Wanna know what can really help writing the next chapter for a story; going back and rereading what you've already posted.

BOLT: I've been using for six years. There is nothing to worry about from here.


	8. The Red X Trilogy I: Where it all began

**Disclaimer:**** I lay no claim to DC Comics property.**

**RED X TRILOGY I: Where it all started.**

**FLASHBACK**

_My death was not quick._

_It was a drawn out, agonizingly slow with a literally explosive finish._

_Back when I was still Robin, Bruce had given me an assignment. He told me I was to track his greatest enemy and report back to him. I was _not_ to engage._

_Odin, I was such an idiot back then._

_I tracked the Joker all over the world. Finally, after months of searching, I had found him in an abandoned factory in Afghanistan. He had been preparing to solve the conflict in the middle east "with a smile." Which meant he was gonna introduce Joker Gas into the air. I managed to stop him. But it came with a price._

_To be blantantly short, the Joker defeated me, impaled me to the ground with a pipe through my belly, beat me half to death with a crowbar, and finally blew up the factory with me in it._

_So why am I floating here in this weird black place?_

_**"Greetings little warrior."**_

_"What the- WHO'S THERE?!" I yell out._

_A man appeared in front of me, And I just don't say that like I didn't notice him before, I mean literally _appeared._**"Just me, my young friend."**_

_The guy was old. _Old,_ old. He had a long white beard, a long flowing robes with peaks of armour underneath them, a sword on his belt that looked like it could cut Superman in half, (I later learned that it COULD.) He had one eye, the other one looked like it had been torn out long ago._

_"And just who are you?" I ask as I attempted to regain my composure._

_**"I am Odin... and we need to discuss your future."**_

**THE PRESENT**

After I saw the broadcast, I took off without explanation to any of my teammates. I didn't have time to tell them anything, and I didn't really want to anyways. I simply left a note on my door that said:

_**Gone Clown Hunting. Be back Later.**_

_**xoxoxo**_

_**-Jason**_

I raced my newly made X-cycle and bugged out as fast as I could. I needed to get some things that I stored, and I didn't have much time to get them. By now, the Titans would be launching a city wide hunt for that laughing bastard.

By the time I got to my destination, I had worked up a real good _angry._ The kinda angry you only get when you're about to face someone who's taken away something of real _meaning_ to you. In my case, the Joker stole my future as a hero... and now I'm bound to the bargain I made with Odin in that... _place_ between this world and the next.

... It's a really long story, okay? Maybe I'll tell you it later.

But I'll tell you one thing. One cannot back out of a bargain with a God.

As I entered the building, I searched for the hiding spot where I hid my little treasure. After two minutes of looking, I had found it. A long black glossy case. I hefted it out of it's storage area and popped it open. And there it was;

The Xenothium Armour.

I built it in case the things Odin had told me that day would come true. (And if they were, I was really, really, _really_ gonna need this frickin' thing.)

It's design was very simple, it was basicly an armored version of the X suit. Although the suit is not nearly as powerful as the armour, it has several advantages over it. There are two flaws in the armour, first and most obvious is it's complete lack of stealth capability. This isn't something you can sneak up on somebody with, fortunately it makes up for it in other abilities. The second, and most dangerous, is its reactor core's unstability. The reactor uses a kind of fission cell of Xenothium to power it, if this powercell is strained to much, it'll blow me to Valhalla. And I'm not talking a little explosion here: This thing could take out five city blocks.

To make things simple, _I better be fucking careful._

But taking down that laughing son of a bitch might be worth it.

With that cheerful little thought, I began to put the armour on.

**FLASHBACK**

_"... you got a deal."_

_Odin smiled widely, __**"Good, good. Now that we have reached an agreement, I will secure your resurrection."**_

_Why do I feel like I just made huge mistake? This future Odin spoke of gave me the damn creeps. I mean, how the hell am I supposed to raise an army? Stupid Gods and their-_

_**"I heard that."**_

_I shook my head. Let's not anger the God who's doing you a solid. "What about the Joker? I can have my revenge on him right?"_

_**"You can do whatever you want, as long as you fulfill your end of the bargain. If the Joker is around when the crisis begins, he could change things for the worst. How might I say this? Ah, 'The Joker is too wild to be allowed to play.' But you must ask yourself this; are you really the kind of warrior to take a man's life?"**_

_"I have no idea._

**THE PRESENT**

When hunting for the Joker, it is best to look in places that are erupting in chaos.

A quick check on the armour's radio scanner told me there was mass panic on Fleet Street and the areas surrounding it. I smile to myself. Bingo.

The Titans were already there apparently, might have to go through them to get my target. Could get dicey. I'm not entirely sure I can take them all on now, even with the armour.

As I stood upon the roof of a building that overlooked where Joker was hiding in, I felt the smallest amount of last time I fought this psycho, I died.

DIED.

You have no idea what it was like. To have your life snuffed out like a candle. To realize that everything you did to build a future for yourself was all for _nothing._ To not even know if you even made a difference- wait. What the hell am I thinking? I'm not goddamn emo, I'm the RED X!

Screw it, I'm gonna jump down there and kick some ass.

TBC...

A/N: I'd say I'm sorry for the wait, but I don't think that would cut it. I got caught up in college and other story ideas. But now I'm back.

Lets see where this puppy takes us.


End file.
